Yesterday I had the pleasure of meeting 2 of my former co-workers babies... Emily, a beautiful little girl, who shares a birthday with Sebastion. Meeting her was like a kick in the fucking face. And Gavin. Gavin's mommy and I found out we were pregnant very close together... she had complications during her pregnancy and was concidered high risk, mostly because the ultrasound showed a mass on Gavin's lung... they had her convinced that he would need surgery upon arrival. He was born just before Thanksgiving, and so far so good... A miracle occured, and he has been surgery free. Beautiful little thing that he is. I'm really, truely happy for these babies, and that they are healthy and happy... but is it ok for me to say that I am jealous? Seriously fucking jealous. (sorry, I've tried to watch my language on here, but can't really do it any longer... if you don't like it then...um.. don't fucking read it) Deep breath. Moving on. Early in my pregnancy with Sebastion, I knew 2 women who had received terrible news about their pregnancies.. Gavin's mommy whom I already mentioned, and Dagan's mommy. Dagan's mommy was informed that he had right heart syndrome when she was nearly 7 months along (she actually didn't even know she was pregnant until @ 6 months)...Dagan is 3 months old now, and doing well. He has had one heart surgery, and will have another at 6 months, and yet another at 2 years. I remember hearing these stories and feeling such heart break for these women... I couldn't even imagine at the time, the sorrow they must have felt... little did I know. Now, the women whom I felt such sorrow for get to cuddle with their beautiful baby boys, and when they see me, look at me with pity, and have no words to say. Life is funny, isn't it?
I want a baby.
Moving on... yesterday was filled with many emotions. I learned that one of my favorite customers, 'the Poet' as I always referred to him, passed away last week. This saddens me greatly. The first day I met this incredible man he told me this: "Today is the Tomorrow that you worried about Yesterday" and I have never forgotten those words. They have actually helped me through some very difficult times in my life (divorce, heart break, dead baby, more heart break). A mantra, if you will, that has hung on my fridge in my past 3 homes. It brougt tears to my eyes as I spoke those words to his widow. But the story I told her about when we first met, put a smile on her face, if only for a moment. RIP Dean... aka, the Poet.
I was also reminded yesterday that I do indeed have a few friends that care about, and actually love me... a dear dear friend gave me this:
|the first I have actually seen his monogram|
And ending on a happy note... when shopping for my FOL/FOH gift exchange I found this:
Speaking of shopping... I can't wait for my gift exchange partner to receive her gift...I'm really excited about it, and I hope she loves it:) I'll post pictures, once she confirms that she has gotten it. Many pictures to come actually, once I have completed all the projects I am currently working on...a painting, and christmas ornaments...
Til next time... wishing you peace, love, and some sort of happiness.