Wednesday, November 24, 2010

gifts from heaven...

Ok.  It may not mean much to others, but as a mother of an angel, I tend to find beauty in nature.  In the fallen leaves, flowers, caterpillars, butterflies, dragonflies, birds, bees...and yes the clouds in the sky.  Call me crazy if you will, but I like to see these things as little signs from our angel above.  Not all of them, but certain things... as my fellow BLM Tiffany likes to call them... winks.

While playing with our daughter in the park on what was likely the last gorgeous day of the year, I noticed this in the sky:

It may not look like much, but to me... I see a giraffe.

Not a whole giraffe... basically just the head, neck and chest.

Close up of the even has 2 ears, as faint as they may be.

Seeing this formation in the sky touched my heart a bit.  I realize to some, the giraffe may not be visible, but I do associate giraffes with Sebastion and saw this as a sign that he was there with his family at the park that day.  I miss him deeply, and this lifted me up, if only for a moment.

I also associate the moon with our little angel... not exactly sure if I have shared why...  In the days between the death of Sebastion, and his funeral, we spent quite a bit of time trying to explain to our 2 year old daughter why mommy and daddy were so incredibly sad.  She couldn't quite understand that 'baby brother' was no longer in mommy's belly, and she had no comprehension what-so-ever that heaven even existed, no matter how many times we stated that 'baby brother' had gone to heaven.  A couple of days before the funeral, we were all standing in the kitchen (where Sebastion's last ultrasound picture still hangs on our fridge to this day) and our sweet little Liliana looks over and says... "bye bye baby brother, I'll see you on the moon."  At which point, Derek and I both looked at each other in disbelief, with tears running down our cheeks.  From that day forward, the moon has had more meaning to our family in general.  This is also the very reason that the cremation jewelry that I purchased for Sebastion's ashes, is a crescent moon.  Geez... still pulls at my heart strings when I think about that night in the kitchen.  Sigh.

This past full moon was brilliantly amazing:
I love when the moon can be seen in broad daylight.

Blurry, but beautiful.

 And now that you know the meaning behind it all... will you think of our little angel every time you see the moon shine down?

The moon shining down over Sebastion's grave.


  1. what a beautiful post mama <3 First let me say that I TOTALLY see the giraffe! But what I first saw when I looked at your picture is that it looks like an ultrasound. Like the profile of a chunky baby complete with round cheeks and a button nose... do you see that too?

    I teared up when I read the part about your daughter saying "see you on the moon" omg... so precious and heartbreaking. I will def think of Sebastion when I see the moon and now giraffes. I def thing its a sign... or a *wink* Sending you love!

  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

  3. I see the Giraffe! He was letting you know he was with you ♥ Just know that I am always thinking about you and about Sebastion. ((hugs)) If there is anything that you ever need or as you know if you ever need to talk, please let me know. I am here for you. I imagine Bryston, Colton and Sebastion having a huge Thanksgiving feast together in Heaven ♥

  4. totally see the giraffe!!! and i love that you found it in the sky. took a picture of the moon the other night and didn't know what prompted me...maybe it was for you. will send it to you when i can get it uploaded to a computer. maybe our babies are playing together in the "big" top circus. wyatt was my little monkey and we lost him in aug.
    much love to you...